I'm Glad You Asked

“I’m glad you asked.”  That is what I’m prepared to say when someone asks, “what is going on with your moustache?”  I need a prepared statement that is more than just, “I’m growing it to raise awareness for men’s health.”  I thought having some statistics in my back pocket would help keep the conversation going and hopefully this will lead in to a conversation that results in, “I’m going to call my doctor to schedule a physical.” I think that’s an easier sell to most than “call your doctor, get a prostate exam.”  Your doctor can recommend whether or not you need to take this next step…here’s what to expect if he/she finds it necessary (exam).

A few statistics about prostate cancer (thank you, webmd.com):

·         80% of men will carry prostate cancer cells in their lifetime

·         1 in 6 men will be diagnosed with prostate cancer

·         1 in 36 will die from the disease

·         Nearly 100% of men diagnosed early, while the cancer is local to the prostate will live 5 years or more. (10-year survival rate = 91%, 15-year survival rate = 76%)

Most of us are going to hear the word “Cancer” and “Prostate” in the same sentence at some point in our lives, but if you get checked out and it’s caught early, you have a much better chance of living until you die from something else like heart disease or freak accident, which rank 1 and 3, respectively (all cancer is #2).

We all know about heart disease and what we can do to help prevent it.  Diet, exercise, avoid alcohol, don’t smoke, get enough sleep, etc. help to prevent heart disease and most other diseases, but how do you prevent freak accidents?  Three things come to mind:

·         Hire a professional to clean your gutters

·         Don’t drive like an idiot

·         Don’t tell inappropriate stories about your wife…(artificially forced) segue…

“I’m glad you asked.” That’s close to “Funny you should ask,” which was my lead-in when my daughter’s little friend asked why we had a bottle with a cork in it on our window sill.  I flatly told her that it was a captured fart that Mrs. Lyons let back in 2002.  We’ve kept it all these years…don’t open it, it will kill us all.  I could tell that at first she was trying to process how we could possibly capture a fart in a bottle, then why would we do such a thing, and eventually disgusted by the idea.  Both girls looked at my wife with twisted faces – “Is he telling the truth?” She just shook her head.  Worth the small percentage increase that I may die from an “accident”.

Cheers,

Brian